The Burnout series is coming to a close and it’s been very popular. I’m glad (and not glad) that it was so popular. Glad because it was helpful. Not glad because it means we all need the help, which means that burnout is resonating with a lot of us. As much as I’m glad to see the platform grow, I’m definitely sad to see the state of our industry. I want us all to be ok, and a lot of us are not ok right now.
So to help that happen, I’m going to do at least one episode on the Ladder and recovery. Maybe two. Let’s start with the Ladder today and see how far we get.
When we talk about the slide down into the pit, once we hit the bottom, there is not a way out. We have to build the way out.
Why?
Because there is no more energy in the well. I’m going to mix metaphors here because there is no perfect one I’ve come up with yet, but imagine this for me.
Imagine you are sitting in the black bottom of this pit, and there are no resources to be found. You go to sleep and wake up to a little bit of fuel. So you use that fuel to try to jump out of the pit. Then it runs out and you can’t move again. So now you go to sleep and there’s a little more fuel when you wake up. Again, you try to jump out. Can’t. Collapse, can’t move. And now you have to sleep again. So this time, you sleep and then wake up and don’t try to get out. You’ve learned that you don’t make enough energy in one sleep to get out. So you try two. Then three. Still can’t jump out.
Then one morning, you wake up and there’s a little more energy than you expected. You haven’t been using it. So you try to construct something with it. Then, when you wake up, there’s even more. And then even more. And you slowly build the ladder that will make you able to climb out. The ladder takes energy. It takes time. And it takes space.
If you think of it in terms of a non-physical thing, think of it like financial debt. When you have been sliding down into massive debt, and you go to a debt counsellor, the first thing they tell you is to stop your spending. Then, you start applying all the money you make that you don’t need to live on to that debt. And you keep applying and applying until the debt is gone, and then you can find a new normal.
This is very similar to burnout recovery.
There’s an energy debt you have to pay in order to get out of the burnout pit. And you can’t climb out until you’ve paid the debt. Unfortunately, there is no Superman or Wonder Woman coming to save you and fly you out of the pit. You have to do the work. That’s the bad news.
The good news is, you are probably being naturally drawn to (not by anxiety, but out of exhaustion) the things that will bring you the energy you need to construct the ladder.
- You want to get better sleep. (Build a ladder rung.)
- You want to read books, some of you. (Build a ladder rung.)
- You want to watch TV or movies. (Build a ladder rung.)
- You want to be around your favorite people. (Build a ladder rung.)
- You want to cut negativity out of your life. (Build a ladder rung.)
- You want to stop being inundated by everyone else’s successes. (Build a ladder rung.)
- You want to lay on the beach and daydream about your books. (Build a ladder rung.)
All of these things are potential ladder rungs. In addition to the “normal” things that you could do to give yourself the energy pennies to build ladder, you’re also going to have some Strengths-related things you could do that will give you energy.
- If you have high Achiever or Focus, you might need to do a lot of small tasks that have been piling up and going undone so you could “do the more important writing work”. Try getting some of what a friend calls “small wins” for high Achievers.
- If you have high Activator, you may want to start exercising. Even just starting with a regular walk (or run, if you’re into that) can be helpful. Get your muscles moving.
- If you have high Connectedness/Empathy/Relator/Positivity, you may want to find your favorite people and get some face time with them. People who are not negative and who fill up your tank. People who make you feel loved and important. If you have a sexual partner, set aside some time to engage in meaningful sex (whatever that looks like for you).
- If you are high Competition, find games to play that are confident wins for you. Some people will turn to sports. Some to board games. Some to other wins. But find places where you can either bring a team some victory, or yourself. You need that energy.
- If you are high Input/Intellection/Learner/Ideation/Context, go to libraries, go to museums, go to lectures, have new experiences, learn something new, immerse yourself in something that will excite you and bring you new ideas.
- If you are high Futuristic/Positivity (and some Achiever/Focus), spend some intentional time re-visioning your future. You may have to grieve the future that is not happening because you are in burnout, but that’s ok. Grief is a process; take the steps through it. Not grieving will not keep the reality away that your future has changed, even if it’s only the short-term future. Re-frame your current context. Vision your way out. See the hope at the end of the tunnel.
- If you are high Significance/Competition/Self-Assurance/Achiever/Maximizer, you have to surround yourself with people who reframe your self-confidence for you. Take yourself out of situations where you feel a lack of confidence. Put yourself into situations where you are reminded of how good you are and how what you’re doing is right. Cut out the places that don’t support this message. (And listen to me carefully here:) No. Matter. Where. They. Come. From. And. No. Matter. How. Hard. It. Will. Be.
- If you are high Responsibility/Belief, you may also have to grieve the loss of productivity or time. You may have to spend extra time re-framing what was realistic to expect from yourself. And learn what the expectations of burnout really are (decreased productivity is expected, increased rest is expected). Be responsible to the expectations of the state you’re in right now, and not to the state you “should” be in. Look for readings and support in this area. If you are religious, pray. It’s important to stay connected to the reality of the situation and to be gentle with yourself. It will not lead to you becoming lazy. I promise. 😊
- If you are high Woo/Communication/Positivity/Includer, you need people. You need some kind of connection to people. It might be finding happy memes to post on your Facebook page. It might be starting an Instagram account and just following accounts of uplifting people. It might be giving speeches on burnout, or it might be talking to a group of friends and trying to help them recover from their burnout. It might be therapy (not just for these four Strengths, but for anyone, by the way).
With any Strength, look at the list of qualities from your report. Those are the things that give you energy. If you like reading, read. If you like working out, work out. If you like planning for the future, plan for the future. If you like traveling, travel. But you have to think of this time as the time when you are repaying your energy debt. Any attempt to jump back to full throttle will put you right back into the pit again.
So… those are my initial prep thoughts on the ladder. I may do another ‘cast next week talking about the recovery process, and how long it will take, and what is the difference between blips and burnouts. Things like that. Sort of like a Q&A. So if you have any questions, let me know! I’d love to address them.
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