For some of us, we will have instant chemistry in our author career. Things will “just work.”
Chemistry is instant. (In the “colloquial” way we use “chemistry” as meaning, “it’s just working” or “it just feels right.”)
Alchemy is a process. (In that it’s transformational, and has to happen by transmuting things from their current form into another form.)
And when we watch other people, and compare ourselves to them, we tend to pick out the people who have chemistry in their careers, and use them as the “why am I not this way” example to make ourselves feel bad (because feeling bad is supposed to produce “action” but it often just leads to shame).
Very few of us know how to wait for the alchemy process to do its thing. Patience is hard. Waiting is painful. Risking is dangerous.
This is why I talk so much about “doing the hard things” and about resilience and skills, etc. Because if we really want what we want, there’s a chance we’re going to have to suffer for it, and not see that suffering as evidence we’re not supposed to (or going to) have it.
We need to be able to look at our process and finding the alchemy of our success as being an exciting process. And then trust the process.
And not see a lack of instant chemistry as evidence that we’re not going to have the thing.
It does require increased patience, increased resilience. And a willingness to do hard things. But it’s not a signal of anything other than “strap in, this will be harder than we thought.”
And I get it. Not everyone wants to wait for the process. Perfectly reasonable. I’m just here representing the fact that patience is not the enemy.
Stay connected to your people and your community. Form friendships. Keep your eyes on the horizon. Touch grass. Do all the things that make this life worth living while you’re waiting, while you’re experimenting, while you’re learning and perfecting.
Now, go open the manuscript. <3
– Becca
